Thoughts on Fear and Friendship

The thought occurred to me today that fear is worse when experienced alone. It's true. Fear about your health problems. Fear about your financial struggles. Fear about your future plans. All three of these fears are real, and they are being experienced by some dear friends of mine at the present time. In each case, the fear is so real...it almost takes on a life of its own. Fear begins to overtake faith. It crowds out hope. It erodes peace. It triumphs over trust.

But think with me for a moment. Is fear as intimidating when shared with a friend?

Consider these terms: Loneliness. Isolation. Depression. Rejection. Discouragement. These words have a lot in common, don't they? Like birds of a feather, peas in a pod. Now, consider another list: Laughter. Warmth. Encouragement. Community. Acceptance. Sounds better, huh? When you think about it, these words are totally incompatible with the former list. Their worlds cannot coexist.

In other words: It's hard to be lonely when you're laughing. It hard to feel rejected when you're watching a game with the guys. It's hard to be depressed on the golf course (OK, well actually, that's not so unusual...) It's hard to be discouraged when your friends believe in you so stinking much!

Psalm 23:4 says, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil , for you are with me." That last phrase is the key. Why shouldn't I fear? Because You, O Lord, are with me. You are my Friend--a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Listen, for any child of God, the truth is you are never alone. That's a given. He is always with you...yes, even in the valley of death. But just in case His love feels too distant to make a difference, here's an idea: Call a friend. (yeah, like an earthly one!) Pour some coffee. Share your hurts. Open up a little. Let them love you, and you'll soon find out that fear has to flee, because true godly friendship wins every time.

Recommended Reading

What is God "calling" me to do?

For the past few weeks, the messages on Sundays have been focused on the WORK that we are supposed to do, as believers in Jesus. 1 Corinthians chapter 3 teaches that every person will one day stand before God to have his/her "work" judged. Verse 13 says, "his work will be shown for what it is," and verse 14 says, "it will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work." (Heavy stuff, huh?) One more thing: only if your work survives will you receive a reward.

So, the questions start rolling in like waves at the beach: What is my work? Am I doing it? Will my work survive the fire of God's judgment? Will I receive a reward? What if I'm not exactly sure? Can I know for certain that God is pleased with my work? The answer to the last question is YES! You CAN know what pleases the Lord. (Ephesians 5:10 says, "find out what pleases the Lord.")

So, let's take it one step further... Ephesians 4:1 says, "Live a life worthy of the calling you have received." Ask yourself an important question: "Do I have a CALLING?" You're thinking that stuff only applies to pastors and missionaries, right? Wrong. Every follower of Jesus is called to do something unique for Him. So what is your calling? Your purpose? Your job to do?

I encourage you to spend some time TODAY asking God these questions. Then, ask again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next. And keep asking, keep praying, keep searching...and God will begin to show you things. I promise He will, because He is a "rewarder of those who diligently seek Him." (Hebrews 11:6)

And for those of you who are interested in further study, I would like to recommend a few resources that have greatly inspired and challenged me. You can pick them up at Barnes & Noble, or order them online from Amazon.com. Here they are: Visioneering, by Andy Stanley; The Dream Giver, by Bruce Wilkinson; and What On Earth Am I Here For?, by Rick Warren. Any of these would be helpful on your journey. Enjoy the search!